I think the most lacking resource in today’s time that is being glaringly overlooked is….
MATURITY.
According to the Oxford dictionary, maturity is defined as “the quality of thinking and behaving in a sensible, adult manner”.
Now how many times have you seen a parent and a child and wondered who is who in the equation??
Have you ever tried to have a discussion with someone where you have opposing views and it disintegrates into a knee-jerk personal attack that leaves you wondering what just happened??
Or have you ever taken a moment to observe most people and realize their actions, thoughts, words, reactions to situations remarkably mimic that of a toddler??
How many times have you secretly thought of telling someone (or for others have actually done it!):
Shut up and Grow up.
Not out of anger or frustration, but for the real intent of those exact words.
Fully functional, non-"special", supposed-adults behaving like children.
All around us.
Day in Day out.
And yet, no one really sees it as a problem of epic proportions.
A problem that is actually at the root of many many many of our society’s dysfunctional state today.
Because we are so scared of hurting the other person’s feelings.
Like they will wither away into dust if they get a good dose of the truth.
Because we are living in a time where we are so consumed with FEELINGS as opposed to THINKING once in a while.
I always find it amazing that people need constant reminding of the following:
Not everyone will like you.
Just as you don’t like everyone you’ve ever met, they have a choice whether or not to like you.
Some people gel instantly, others take some time, and some people don’t gel at all.
Move on.
Not everyone will agree with you.
Just as you feel entitled to have an opinion, so do others have that right too.
And it’s not the end of the world if someone does not agree with you or see your point of view.
You do not have to get into a hissy fit, stomp your feet, throw personal attacks at the other person.
It does not make you right.
It does not make you a better person.
You have not won.
Yes, life is not fair.
And no, you do not live in a Prince/Princess world where everything will happen to your exact specifications, at your whim and you will live happily ever after.
Life is hard.
But through the struggle at navigating it, there is much joy, peace, laughter, love, exhilarating excitement and contentment.
Your greatest attribute to acquire would be adaptation.
Because the only things certain in this life are constant change and your mortality.
Deal with it.
No you did not just “fall in love”.
And it didn't JUST happen.
You were attracted to a person.
You CHOSE to then be with that person and foster more intimate feelings with that person. Spend more time, open up your life to them, and let them into your head and heart.
You DID have a moment of choice.
Your life is not a Disney movie.
Stop kidding yourself.
Yes, you are to blame.
Not everything in the world is someone else’s fault.
You make decisions.
You make dumb decisions.
Sometimes repeatedly, because of your constant denial to take personal responsibility.
You can point the fingers at everyone else, but you need to wake up, smell the coffee, and take stock of your life.
You have to live with the consequences.
Accept it.
My words may seem harsh right now, since most people are not used to others being direct with them and many will take it as a personal attack as opposed to what it is, some well-meaning and much needed advice.
But, you will save yourself and others around you a lot of mental, emotional, and sometimes physical turmoil if you just indeed truly grow up.
MATURITY.
According to the Oxford dictionary, maturity is defined as “the quality of thinking and behaving in a sensible, adult manner”.
Now how many times have you seen a parent and a child and wondered who is who in the equation??
Have you ever tried to have a discussion with someone where you have opposing views and it disintegrates into a knee-jerk personal attack that leaves you wondering what just happened??
Or have you ever taken a moment to observe most people and realize their actions, thoughts, words, reactions to situations remarkably mimic that of a toddler??
How many times have you secretly thought of telling someone (or for others have actually done it!):
Shut up and Grow up.
Not out of anger or frustration, but for the real intent of those exact words.
Fully functional, non-"special", supposed-adults behaving like children.
All around us.
Day in Day out.
And yet, no one really sees it as a problem of epic proportions.
A problem that is actually at the root of many many many of our society’s dysfunctional state today.
Because we are so scared of hurting the other person’s feelings.
Like they will wither away into dust if they get a good dose of the truth.
Because we are living in a time where we are so consumed with FEELINGS as opposed to THINKING once in a while.
Not everyone will like you.
Just as you don’t like everyone you’ve ever met, they have a choice whether or not to like you.
Some people gel instantly, others take some time, and some people don’t gel at all.
Move on.
Not everyone will agree with you.
Just as you feel entitled to have an opinion, so do others have that right too.
And it’s not the end of the world if someone does not agree with you or see your point of view.
You do not have to get into a hissy fit, stomp your feet, throw personal attacks at the other person.
It does not make you right.
It does not make you a better person.
You have not won.
Yes, life is not fair.
And no, you do not live in a Prince/Princess world where everything will happen to your exact specifications, at your whim and you will live happily ever after.
Life is hard.
But through the struggle at navigating it, there is much joy, peace, laughter, love, exhilarating excitement and contentment.
Your greatest attribute to acquire would be adaptation.
Because the only things certain in this life are constant change and your mortality.
Deal with it.
No you did not just “fall in love”.
And it didn't JUST happen.
You were attracted to a person.
You CHOSE to then be with that person and foster more intimate feelings with that person. Spend more time, open up your life to them, and let them into your head and heart.
You DID have a moment of choice.
Your life is not a Disney movie.
Stop kidding yourself.
Yes, you are to blame.
Not everything in the world is someone else’s fault.
You make decisions.
You make dumb decisions.
Sometimes repeatedly, because of your constant denial to take personal responsibility.
You can point the fingers at everyone else, but you need to wake up, smell the coffee, and take stock of your life.
You have to live with the consequences.
Accept it.
My words may seem harsh right now, since most people are not used to others being direct with them and many will take it as a personal attack as opposed to what it is, some well-meaning and much needed advice.
But, you will save yourself and others around you a lot of mental, emotional, and sometimes physical turmoil if you just indeed truly grow up.
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